Day 6 : Bipolar

Should probably be day 7 but I didn't have time to write any yesterday so here goes.

Today was a very busy day. Woke up early and headed to class. While waiting for the second class, I went over to the library and sat there. I guess I really couldn't be left alone even for 5 minutes. I began reminiscing again about "him" and me. "Im not gonna cry. I won't cry." I really don't know how my body system works but apparently the water contain in me is overloaded as I manage to cry heavily everyday since last week. If I would to collect all the tears that flow out of my eyes, I would fill up a whole tub! I turned on the song "Goodbye to you" by Michelle Branch.

The lyrics "You were the one I loved, the one thing that I tried to hold on to" really matches what I'm feeling at this particular moment. Resting my head on the table, I cried again. My friend, Farhanah, who has been helping me since the first day, came to me and gave me a warm hug. For everything that has happened, I can't deny I am still blessed as I have so many people around me to make me happy and always be there for me.

That night we had this religious discussion called "usrah" among the Malaysians students. The topic is "Challenges in Life". Gosh what a coincidence! I have to say this discussion helps me in a way especially when it came to the question "Why can't we get something that we really want although we try so hard to get it?". In the holy Quran, it says "It may be that you hate something when it is good for you, and it may be that you love something when it is bad for you. Allah knows, and you do not know." (Surat al-Baqara, 216)

Never crosses my mind that you're bad for me, but like it says there, Allah knows better. Maybe it is better for you, maybe it is better for me. I have to learn to accept the fact that everything happens for a reason even when I had tied the camel. Who knows, maybe we're not together now but could be in the future we will meet each other again. Only God knows. Don't ever lose faith.

CherryBee