25 : Grotesque

Rise and shine~

Someone said "I hate what you've become". Newsflash, you made me like this. I wasn't like this before. Yeah it's so easy for you to just say it as if I'm a robot where you can just change the programming code. And whatever this "I've become", it certainly shows infront of some people only.

N said to me "Sabrina, it's not worth it to change yourself because of someone. You never hated anyone in your life, not even "him". This is the first time I'm seeing you hate someone so much and I'm telling you it's not worth it because I know you. Let her do what she wants, you have a mission here and I know you'll turn up great."

Hm.. You're right. I never in my life hated anyone, never even once. I don't believe in hating or fighting, but this time it's different. And if I really hate this person anyway, I shouldn't let the person change me. But seriously what can I do about it. I do believe though that when you're betrayed, God will listen to your prayers. It is said and proven.

I asked only one question to him, but up until now the only answer I'm getting is somewhat like "You're just assuming", "I'm not happy or sad", "No I am not with her". But why am I seeing it differently, or perhaps the other person is the one trying. Hah, whatever. Seriously, how long will this continue. How long do I have to cry, not to mention every single effing day. I just wish that .........



CherryBee